Stupid rich hat

President Edgar Chagwa Lungu: File pictures

SO MANY Zambians have twitted and posted Facebook messages of love and goodwill to the Mwanawasa family to mark seven years since the passing of Levy.

“Levy Mwanawasa is a man who was ready to risk his hold on power in preference to long-term economic stability,” wrote one Facebook fan.

Another supporter wrote: “He was a man who promoted the rule of law, a new deal government founded on strict management.”

“Zambia may never have such a devoted and visionary leader like Levy. He was simply the best,” tweeted another supporter.

The messages went on and on, but what all of you forget is that Levy wouldn’t have been such an adored leader without his wife Maureen.

I think if Levy was an intelligent man, Maureen went further to make him be the best husband and greatest father of the nation, to the satisfaction of all of you who tweeted, because that is what a good first lady does.

So this brings me to the point I am trying to make here.

Maureen, will you kindly look around the country and marry for us another damn good president please, if that’s not too much to ask.

I know you are a lawyer now and your perception of things has even improved. So if Zambians loved Levy, show them that you can even do better this time.

Everyone is shy to tell you this Maureen, but hear it from me; you are delaying our journey towards prosperity. We will never get back the dollar to K3 if you don’t make that move – I know you have ‘do’ it before and you can ‘done’ it again. Wink!

Ooops! Sorry my President, I didn’t know you would be reading this. Someone misled me that you were actually dozing so I thought I could take a moment to flirt with Maureen while you rested, but don’t worry she doesn’t take me seriously.

Now that we know you are wide awake, please tell me my President; at how much did we auction your black hat again? US$15, 000 dollars? Wow! And Edith Nawakwi says my President wears stupid hats? Edith, if stupidity costs US$15, 000 then I don’t want to be wise. This is by far the most expensive hat in the history of stupid hats.

What you should also know Edith is that this hat is the ugliest in the wardrobe; so wait until my President drops the ones he bought from Yoweri Museveni on his recent trip.
I don’t even know how much FDD is worth as a party but just know this Edith, my President can easily sale a couple of hats (in dollars because he doesn’t like the way the kwacha is falling) and he can buy all your party members to replace the stupid, arrogant PF members whom he has told to get out.

If he wants he can even buy and kill all the fish from Lake Kariba because he wasn’t happy last week when he visited Siavonga, to hear that the fish was drinking too much of little remaining water that Zesco is surviving on.

That’s it for today

         

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