Tranquilized state

President Lungu dozing during a meeting with some diplomates businessmen who paid him a courtesy call at State House-Picture by Tenson Mkhala

DOCTOR Boniface Fundafunda, I have always had a lot of respect for you, but now I am loosing it because of the way you are managing the distribution of essential drugs at Medical Stores.

It’s not too long ago when you wrote to government claiming that the country has run out of vital medicines.

So where the hell are these ministers getting the diazepam from?

Dr Fundafunda, we all want to sleep because we are not happy with so many things going on right now. So I find it unacceptable for you to restrict the distribution of these important sedatives to a few ministers.

Us ordinary citizens are the ones who deserve free supplies of diazepam because we are failing to sleep naturally, be it day or night.

How do you justify your actions to give my President and ministers like Alexander Chikwanda the little remaining sleeping drugs at the expense of millions of citizens?

If it’s Chikwanda, being a stingy man that he is, he must have taken the share of Diazepam you allocated to Chishimba Kambwili so that the overdose keeps him at peace the whole month. Because how does a Minister of Finance miss a State House fundraising event?

Chikwanda is actually the best golfer from Kaunda’s generation of government employees, but he missed the State House tournament because of your generosity Dr Fundafunda.

What I know is that in a medicine crisis situation like we have at the moment in Zambia, all of us as citizens have to ration the little remaining essential drugs like Valium, Morphine, Piriton and so on, with priority of course given to the Head of State.

I am not complaining that you are giving my President too much of the sleeping pills, no! With the current state of affairs, you probably have to double his dosage, because my President needs to sleep more often.

In fact, if you had delivered the sleeping pills to State House on time last Sunday, my President wouldn’t have said there “will be no elections next year in his speech”.

So why don’t you give my friend Amos Chanda the task to tranquilize my President every time he tries to sleep-talk, because we can’t afford to keep him awake with such an overzealous opposition snooping around every word he utters.

That is how I think you should utilise the remaining drugs Dr Fundafunda, not giving them to people like Freedom Sikazwe.

Unless you tell me there is serious pilferage at Medical Stores Limited, otherwise, who gave Sikazwe sleeping pills instead of much more important Cabinet ministers, or indeed the first lady.

Yeah, I really think Esther needs to take a nap immediately because at the rate she is going, she will surely clash with Edith Nawakwi who is also troubled by insomnia.

That’s it for today

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