And by that, I don’t mean I met Mr Chilubanama at the urinary gutter and judged his endowment. Yes I know, that might be accurate, given the bitter pill he has been forced to swallow, but still more, that’s not what I mean.

You see fellas, in life there are bad ideas and no ideas; Mr Chilubanama had no idea the game would be over. That’s why he was busy insulting crocodiles while dangling his ntwenukani outside the boat.

Patrick SIKANA: “Dear Mr. Chilubanama, Do you remember our little incident at Manda Hill Shopping Centre in Lusaka in March this year? That day when you reversed your big car into my little jalopy (or as you reminded me, my wreck), and refused to even apologize? Do you remember telling me you were in a hurry and I could go and report you anywhere if I wanted? That day you deserved my fury, but I forgave you. Today you deserve my sympathy and advice.”

Actually Mr Sikana, we are all jostling to give Mr Chilubanama advice. Mine is easy; don’t be fooled by those fancily dressed mercenaries who are coming to comfort you in your pyjamas and a stupid T-shirt. Get it from me – its over!

In life, those who are seen to be dancing are thought to be insane by those who can’t hear the music. I have no doubt that today, you can hear the music loud and clear, especially that you are closer to the Player than the rest of us.

Out here, we have done our share of the dancing and the music has even become monotonous now. It’s your turn Mr Chipubanama (as late Michael fondly called you), to jive on the dance floor and show us your groove, or grief if you like – the song is called Dununa Reverse!

And by the way, I hope you have cleared that BeForward showroom at your house (or BeReverse, as Mr Sikana now confirms), because the ACC is asking me for directions; meaning very soon, you will move from your Worship to our Warship!

Let me not lie to you sir, this period will be very rough for you if you are not man enough, unless of course you are used to premature ejections. Wink!

That’s it for today

Twitter: @jmwenda29
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