As we continue observing breast cancer awareness month, I decided to share this story by Shenda Zukas who lost her sister to this beast just last month. She shares her sister’s tough journey through chemo and a brief celebration when she went into remission only for the cancer to return with a vengeance. She also shares her experience with getting a mammogram and encourages other women to regularly check themselves.

Here is the story Zukas so graciously allowed me to share today, and please, feel free to share it with your loved ones too:

This is not a pity party soppy story…it’s a cancer and breast cancer awareness story..a ‘Be Cancer Alert Campaign’. If it gets even one person to have a mammogram, then my work would have been done.
In early 2021, my sister detected a small hard lump in her right breast that was painless, she put it down to hormonal changes. I told her not to worry, it will go away and that it was probably just a cyst. Soon after – maybe 4-5 weeks, the pea sized lump started to give her slight discomfort. She decided to have it checked out.
That very week she had a biopsy done. The lump was malignant….cancerous. Being hit with news of a breast cancer diagnosis can be completely overwhelming – a roller coaster of emotions (we had been there before – our mother had died from colon cancer).

Within weeks of being told she had breast cancer, she had to then decide whether to have a mastectomy (total breast removal, partial) or not at all – the female breast, the socially and culturally defined and accepted definition of femininity, womanhood, vitality and yes….beauty, the loss of which can have devastating psychological effects. What would she look like? How would others treat her? Will she ever feel ‘whole’, feminine or attractive without them? Will she forever feel ‘less than’? People will stare. Will the chest look lopsided if she only removed the affected one? Finding the right support bra, fillers. How will the mastectomy affect her quality of life…

She opted for a double mastectomy. ‘Ba fifumyefye. Inga fyanshi’..(‘just remove them, what do I need them for’), I’ve had 5 children and I now have grandchildren, she said. Somehow on the day she was to have the double mastectomy, the surgeon decided to have just the one removed …( a story for another day).
Not only did she have to deal with her cancer diagnosis in a short space of time, she now had to mourn the loss of part of her identity, a breast, her changed body… the scars.

She had chemotherapy treatment which came with hair loss, nausea, vomiting, fatigue, headaches, muscle aches, tingling sensation in hands and feet, skin discolouration, loss of appetite, loss of weight, digestive, heart and lung problems…….the pain. If that wasn’t bad enough, she was ‘allergic’ to morphine which was meant to relieve her cancer pain. She had to settle for other less potent meds for pain relief. She went into partial remission. The tumor cells didn’t appear to be growing. November, 2021, we rejoiced. Had a big celebration..we ate, we drank. We were merry.

A few months later cancer returned with a vengeance. Having a mastectomy or chemotherapy did not lower the chance of the cancer coming back in other parts of the body. It recurred in the tissue that lines the chest wall and in the skin surrounding the original site.. AND in the other breast that had not been removed. She had inflammatory breast cancer. It had metastasized, it had spread …the scars and areas surrounding it across her chest ..the area was hot to the touch, red, tight, angry. It creeped up to the skin around her throat area too, sometimes making it difficult for her to breathe.

Then came more rounds of chemo with stronger cocktail of drugs…same side- effects, just more vicious. This time around the skin literally peeled off the palms of her hands and soles of her feet.

The mastectomy came with its own side effects too – pain, tenderness and swelling at surgery site including the opposite breast, limited arm or shoulder movement, numbness in the chest or upper arm, nerve pain, lymphodema…the list goes on. Lymphatic drainage and ordinary massage and pain medication helped so she had both good and bad days. She never once complained or said why me. When asked how she was doing, she would always reply ‘I’m good’ and she instead went into helping others face the challenge of living with and through cancer.
Ladies let us get into the habit of being aware of our own bodies and what our breast tissue feels like. Self examination can be a great way of detecting cancer early. Who knows our breasts better than ourselves (well…), so yes check yourself regularly (it’s not a crime ) but nothing replaces a mammogram. Regular mammography is the most effective tool to detect breast cancer even before a lump can be felt. Today, advances in genetics, genomics, screening and greater awareness of potential causes of breast cancer have allowed women at high risk to reduce their chances of developing breast cancer. For women at average risk, annual mammograms from ages 45 to 54, mammograms annually or every other year from ages 55 and up are advised.

Both my mother and sister lost their lives to cancer… (June, 2001 and September, 2023). My mum’s cousin had uterine cancer and had a hysterectomy. Considering there’s a family history, on 23rd June of this year, I had my first mammogram done. The breasts are placed between two metal plates and then compressed to obtain clear images. Yes that breast compression – literally turns a cup into a saucer (oh what it is to be a woman). The twisting, squishing and squashing was awful, but it only takes less than 15 minutes all together and a bit of lingering discomfort afterwards, but hey it’s a billion times better than having to fight cancer.

‘So you don’t want to have a mammogram because it pinches, pulls and squeezes ..well so do those skinny jeans!’ ‍

Hair loss is right up there as one of the most distressing side effects of cancer treatment. Hair loss, or alopecia, makes some people feel vulnerable, self-conscious and exposed. For some, the threat of hair loss may intensify the lack of control one may feel after a cancer diagnosis. Mum decided to cut her hair before she could see it falling off. My sister also wanted to atleast have some control over how she looked and would sometimes wear a headress of some sort. She was also bold, almost defiant sometimes so she only wore a duku on occassion to show others that it was also ok to be bald – ‘no hair, no stress’ kubuka fye (you just get up and go), she would say. So on some days she kinda liked her bald head too (we had names for it). She looked beautiful.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month and in support of those suffering from cancer, 1st – 31st October is also known as DukuTober, a Zambia Cancer Society initiative, when dukus (head wraps, scarves, turbans often worn by cancer patients, many of whom lose their hair during chemotherapy), become more than just a head wrap, and are consciously worn as a symbol of solidarity with those battling cancer. In addition to wearing the Duku in support, remember that reaching out, spending time with them, or showing you care in other ways is its own gift.

#dukutober #zambiacancersociety
#cancersupport #breastcancer #CANCERSUCKS #breastcancerawareness #getmammogrammed #earlydetectioncansavelives #EveryoneHasARoleToPlay