I DON’T care about your manifesto, just show me your groove and you have my vote.

Those who have gone to campaign rallies to hear the agenda that presidential candidates have for them, have either lost their teeth or found their Creator.

So fellow voters, there is nothing you will get from the campaign rally this year, other than a good pubic order beating.

My advice is that you stay home and only come out on 8/11 to vote for whichever candidate will still have buttocks left after this campaign war – I mean you can’t swear in a butt-less president, how will they chair Cabinet meetings?

As for me, I am not going to trade my loyalty for my President no matter what happens, unless of course there is a candidate who can outdo him in a tequila challenge; or at least someone who can jive Ndombolo better than him at annual balls.

I am not promising anything yet, but so far I like the groove from the wealthiest candidate in the race, Although I am not sure if Mr HH is paying his tailor well, because I am certain that his trousers will give up one day with this nyeere dance from Gwembe valley.

That’s it for today